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::rachel::

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your act only works on an audience ♥ [Tuesday
Aug. 29th @ 1:21pm]
[ mood | bored ]

mmkay so i havent updated this thing in FOREVER.
wow.

soo, here goes nothin about my lovely, lonely life.

me and shane are broke up and have been for almost 2 months or so now.. it sucks, and im still kinda sad over it- but im good to say the least.

school started back the 15th and im semi-enjoying it.
i have drama, algebra II, office administration and english 11- they're all pretty fun except algebra because i freakin hate math lol

I GOT MY CLASS RING TODAY! i loooove it =D
i may take some pics of it and put em on here.. who knows.

but i guess thats it..? i think i covered everything.
shane sucks- some of my classes suck- and yet im doin wonderful ♥

yepp. . . thats about it. . .

2 ♥ love

&& oh we just get closer. . . [Saturday
Jul. 1st @ 5:04pm]
[ mood | ditzy ]

my boyfriend is a complete dumbass lmao

but my goodness. . .

he's wonderful ♥

1 ♥ love

kiss me like an overdramatic actor. . . [Monday
Jun. 26th @ 1:07am]
[ mood | sad ]

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

yah, thats me ♥


shane is grounded for a damn month.
i think i shall die before that month is up, cause i miss him soo flippin much =(

Comments for support please =)


I LOVE YOU ALL.

9 ♥ love

aint no other man but you. . . [Thursday
Jun. 22nd @ 7:39pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

"we don't fall under the 'cute' couples or the
'perfect couple' or the 'lousiest couple'
we have our own way of liking each other
we entertain each other in the weirdest way
we talk in such a strange way nobody would understand.
because we're us. we're not like any other couples."


r m y & s d p


6:19:06
10 ♥ love

baby im amazed at the way you love me all the time. . .or maybe im afraid of the way i really need u [Friday
Jun. 16th @ 10:36am]
[ mood | blah ]

Hellogoodbye- Call && Return

the chorus::

If only you were here
(Things would be more magical)
If I were there
(Right now I'd be more radical)
You're so not near
(I'm wishing I could place a call)
And feel closer to you, oh

Miles of air and road and land
You separating me from all my plans
We're havin'-havin'-havin', havin' fun
But something-something tell me I miss someone ♥



Me && shell are in desperate need of some certain men. . .
we are very sad girls =(

LEAVE ME COMMENTS. .
to make me feel better please ♥


Update Later
I LOVE YOU ALL.
2 ♥ love

its not healthy. . .for me to feel this way. . . [Tuesday
Jun. 13th @ 9:27am]
[ mood | chipper ]

Today was great! =))
i've missed everyone from upward bound so much, especially Nicholas Reid Stiltner
im totally in love with that boy. . .
my god haha.
4 ♥ love

a love story like ours should be on the big screen or in the pages of a novel. . . [Monday
Jun. 12th @ 7:35am]
[ mood | content ]

Update tiiiime!



Sooo, mmkay.
this update is gonna be totally random, so be prepared for some mind-blowing news ;) haha.

-im currently on a strict diet for the rest of the summer.
me && ma made a deal that if i lost at least 20 lbs by the time school starts back, she would give me one of her checks to go shopping with! (which is like $600 haha)

-i miss my friends SO FREAKIN BAD! especially kendra, kirstie, mary, jalisa, shell, wes, sash && my dear, dear kelsey. . who i have not gotten to meet just yet, but very soon will! haha

-tomorrow is the 1st day of college bound. im kinda excited, kinda not
there better be some hott guys there again this summer, or else i'll be upset lol.

-i miss mr. aaron baker =(
i talked to johnathan, his little brother, the other day && it made me realize i hadnt talked to aaron in forever.

-ma got me some kickass Dora the Explorer yogurts the other day, as a part of my diet. I love yogurt. . .its the best. && to make the yogurts even more damn cooler, they're dora the explorer yogurts; yah, bitch.

-i miss my best friend marney.
i havent talked to him in like a week or so && yah, im totally havin' marn withdrawals lmao

-ive became addicted to dancing && buying cd's.
i dance every afternoon && the past 2 times ive been to wal-mart, ive bought 2 cds : Taking Back Sunday's new one && Angels and Airwaves new cd.

-i've came to the conclusion that i watch too many movies, && i watch the same ones. . .too many times haha.

-i looked at a "detroit skyline" layout on Myspace today && it made me miss Detroit sooo bad. . .i miss my gramma && my whole family =(

-i think here lately, ive been in a depressed state. . .but never really noticed i was depressed. Its like here lately, ive been so happy && like crazy actin, that i feel for once this year. . .ive been truly happy; && it feels wonderful =)

-i miss my brother. he stays here most of the time, but when he's here. . .im pretty much out of the picture. Whitney comes up every day && they do stuff together. i mean, i love whit. . .but i just feel completely shut out of his life; like all the things we used to do together, now him && whit do.

-today i got to thinkin about things. . .&& im totally excited about the fair.
i know its not all that much to look at most of the time, but i just love the togetherness of everyone i suppose haha =)

-i need to start running again.
me && jade were supposed to go today, tomorrow && wednesday. . buttt, she hasnt called or anything, so ahh; its okay i guess. . .there's always my exercise bike! ;) lol

-i want to sing at the fair this year.
haha i dont know why, but i want to; i love singing && i wanna show off my voice! =) not to brag or anything though.. .lol

-im sick && tired of it storming every freakin day.
it got real bad again last night && thanks to my good ole friend Mike Sumner, i was okay =)
he asked me random questions all night to keep my mind off of the storm. . .how sweet is that, seriously?! haha.

-i miss my softball girls sooo bad; hell, i just miss softball in general.
whit, rae, britt, gina, dana, tarah, carrie && more of my big sisters haha, wont be there next year =(
after graduation whit asked me to take care of the softball team for her. . .i bout cried lol

-aarons little brother, johnathan asked me out the other day lmao
i love that kid so much. . .haha but love his heart, he's only 14 && i think i may of hurt his feelings lol
he said i was gorgeous && that he'd date me if i would date him haha.

-jade is leaving for the beach on thursday. . .she'll be gone for 2 weeks =(
im gonna miss the shit out of her.

-some guys, excuse me. . MOST guys are assholes.
i have my reasons to say this, but i wont get into it on here.

-i miss nicholas reid stiltner!!!
he better be at college bound tomorrow, or i'll be forced to kick his ass haha.



butttt, hmm. . .i think that may be all.
if i think of anything else, i'll make sure && put it in here later! =)

I LOVE YOU ALL! ♥

8 ♥ love

standin in the front justa shakin yo' ass. . . [Sunday
Jun. 4th @ 2:14pm]
[ mood | crazy ]

Mmkay- sooo, i went to jades yesterday && it was. . .well, whats the worddddd. . .interesting lmao

the day was good;
we watched old "home" movies && hung out, like the sisters we are =) haha.
we have so much fun together- we're complete dumbasses lol

anywho, her mommy made us fried ice cream cause i hadn't ever tried it- let me just say, its the only mexican dish, other than spanish rice, i will ever eat haha. i loved it! yum =)

other than watching movies && eating, haha, we went to Marneys last night to "play ddr" lmao
it was CRAZY! but i wont get into details about that on here. . .ya wanna know anything, just ask me on the Q && i shall tell you all that can be known ;) hahaha.

Some insides from last night-
"Do it jade, dont be a rachel": Marney
"They're ugly. . .fat and ugly!": Jade
"Call C for Cock. . .Call Y for Y not have more sex": Drew
"There's all kinds of balls here. . .2 4 6 8 10 12 14 balls here!": Jade

"Omgosh, how would the deaf kids be able to pass notes? i mean they cant. . .wait a min. . .they could still read": Me
"yeah, they'd like sign language. . can you see the teacher signin "hey! you guys stop that sign languaging && do your work": Dust

"omgosh, you have surpassed me. . .im the most horrible person ever, and you just beat me Rach": Drew
"Jade's ridin tiny!": Marney

"Theres a fork on your stairs": Me
"Fork you": Marney

"You're peein for a long time": Me
"SHUTUP!": Jade

Bottom line:: it was a fun night all in all. lol

buuuut. . .
this mornin we woke up && went to church!
it was so fun- i need to start goin to church. . .i never go anymore =(
&& omgosh, guess what?! when i got to church, i seen WESSSLEY ADAM ROSE! gah, i love that boy more than life itself! ♥
After church was over, we went to jades, hung around for a while, && then dad came and got me =)

&& that has been my wonderful 2 days. . .exciting, i know lmao

LEAVE ME SOME COMMENTS BITCHES!
or else. . . ;) *

10 ♥ love

you're the best man ive ever known, theres no way i could ever go. . . [Friday
May. 26th @ 7:54pm]
[ mood | bored ]

Song Lyrics from the community ifeel_likeasong

I'm tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here
so tired of being alone
so hurry up and get here

I don't know if I could fly a plane
well enough to tailspin out your name
or high enough to lose control completely
honey, I'm thinking maybe... you know, just maybe

I hope to God I mean a little more then the sounds that escape your tired 4 A.M. lips
And oh-how I wish I meant a little more then a symphony of heavy breathing and the friction of hips

I'm a pretender at the game of love.

Still a little bit of your song in my ear
Still a little bit of your words I long to hear
You step a little closer to me
So close that I can't see what's going on

Whenever you’re near I hide my tears
behind a painted smile
You can’t imagine the tears and sorrow
behind a painted smile

Because it doesn't feel right
And I'm mostly very tired
Life is easy when you fake it

For every beach there's always a tide
And everything's calm, everything's bright
Everything's beautiful outside
Is it just me or is it so cruel how everything dies?

this our last goodnight
say what you will, say all that you can
this is our last goodbye
this is where love ends

just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs
of violence, of love, and of sorrow.
I beg for just one more tomorrow!
Where you'd hold me down, fold me in

And there is no, no song I could sing
And there is no combination of words I could say
But I will still tell you one thing
We're better together...

The only thought I get of you sickens me
Everybody knows your fate
Youre everything I fucking hate
And Im everything that you could never be

I've been watching your world from afar
I've been trying to be where you are
And I've been secretly falling apart
Unseen.

don't waste your words
darling a person can forget words
but a bruise on the left eye will stay for atleast two weeks

And when you're dancing and laughing
And finally living
Hear my voice in your head
And think of me kindly

i never doubted you at all
the stars collide, won't you stand by and watch them fall?
so hold me till the sky is clear,
and whisper words of love right into my ear

Ich will dass ihr mir vertraut
Ich will dass ihr mir glaubt
Ich will eure Blicke spüren
Ich will jeden Herzschlag kontrollieren

Translated:

I want you to trust me
I want you to believe me
I want to feel your eyes
I want to control every heartbeat

I'd get right back on the aeroplane,
The Greyhound bus, the subway train
If I thought it'd ease the pain...

And I wish that you could see the other better part of me
Feel this fire I'm feeling
Then you'd see me in control
And baby then you'd know

If you run fast enough

Then maybe you'll stop yourself

From making the same mistakes again

Let’s not go back
Let’s do our best to blend in and forget
I still can’t move
I miss the feeling and everything but you

anata to futari de kono mama kieteshimaou
ima anata no karada ni tokete hitotsu ni kasanarou
tada anata no nukumori wo
hada de kanjiteru yoake

English:
(if we stay like this we will disappear completely
I am melting into you, becoming one
it's just your warmth
against my skin in the dawn)

2 ♥ love

[Thursday
May. 25th @ 8:43pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

NO more updates for a long ass time. . .

10 ♥ love

i'll look after you. . . [Wednesday
May. 24th @ 4:20pm]
[ mood | content ]

Well. .
today was the last day of school.

i was supposed to go and take a test for Sykes, but i didnt feel like goin- so yeah, i was a rebel today; i freakin rule haha.

Anywho, other than gettin out today- i found out some bad news =/
we were gonna buy this really pretty "house" && the bank was gonna loan us the money and everything. . .well mom was about to get it and they said we couldnt because it was a double wide && not a house.
okay, seriously, how ridiculous is that?!?! im freakin pissed. Gah. . .oh well though. Hopefully we find a "house" soon.

Although school is out. . .i have to go back in 20 days or so.
im goin to college bound again this summer- i know you guys are wonderin "why the hell is she gonna do that whenever she can lay around all day doin nothin?" well that my dears, is my point. Why stay around here all day, gettin fat && sittin on my ass, when i can be with my lovely darlings kendra, liv && jess for a good 6 weeks? yeah, argue with that bitches lmao.

Buuut, i reckon thats it =)
i shall update LATER!

I LOVE YOU ALL!

EDiT::
Well guys, things are only getting worse.
i have some major family problems right now && things arent looking very well for us, so please. . .
pray for my family ♥
&& if you care anything about me, leave me a comment =(

2 ♥ love

lets compare scars, i'll tell you whose is worse. . . [Saturday
May. 20th @ 3:45pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KELS!!! ♥

I LOVE YOU DARLING && i hope you have a wonderful day =)





[[p.s.- graduation is today; im prepared to ball my eyes out]]

Update Later!
I LOVE YOU ALL!

2 ♥ love

no let's talk it over, number i can call- goodbye says it all. . . [Monday
May. 15th @ 8:20pm]
[ mood | determined ]

Mark my words. . .

i will NEVER fall for another sweet-talkin boy ever again ♥





Please guys, help me stick to this promise =]

Update Later!
I LOVE YOU ALL!

8 ♥ love

&& i just cant wait for you to hate me a little more. . . [Saturday
May. 13th @ 7:52pm]
[ mood | content ]

Short Update. . .


My day consisted of Norton *

The Highlights ::
- Dad got a tat today with mine && jesse's name in it; its soo pretty =)
- Whit got a tat, also!! its a butterfly on her lowerback, i love it haha *
- I seen my sister today at Wal-Mart, yes, that'd be MARY MORGAN PHILLIPS! ♥ && i also met telena for the first time lol
- I almost got my tongue pierced today, mom was almost convinced- but decided to be gay && say no haha- i love my ma though =) ; she said she'd think about it haha
- Went to Applebee's today for mom && dads Ann./Whit's b-day/Mother's day ;; my waiter was a total hottie ;) haha && whit got sang to, it was so funny lol

EDiT :: WESLEY ADAM ROSE is the best guy i think i've ever known =) i love him dearly && he deserves the best girl a guy could have. . .oh && did i mention that he's wonderful?!? no? well, he is =)
I LOVE YOU WESSY POO! haha ♥


But that'd be it =)
comments would so be appreciated *

Update Later. . .
I LOVE YOU ALL!

6 ♥ love

oh god give me a reason, im down on bended knee. . . [Sunday
May. 7th @ 5:40pm]
[ mood | depressed ]

Why is that when i find someone i really start to like. . .
it all goes wrong?

Why can't i just be happy for once in my life?!?
im so sick of this- i really am.

He is -p e r f e c t- for me, so why cant i have him to myself?

I dont know what to do anymore. . .
there's just no hope for me.

I have the lowest self-esteem/self confidence right now && am becoming depressed =(
I hate this. . .i hate it so much.

If anyone can answers those questions for me, i shall love you until the day that i die ♥



Update Later. . .
i love you all

15 ♥ love

i just wanna break you down so badly, in the worst way. . . [Friday
May. 5th @ 10:57pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

Highlight of my day ::


(Ron Compton is talkin to Poston)
Whit Compton- "Dad!"
Ron-"Hey haha"
(Continues talking to Poston)
Whit-Dad...hey dad...
Ron- what whit?
Whit-...what are you doing?
(Ron continues talking to Poston)
Whit- hey dad...
Ron- what?
Whit- Can i act like a parrot && sit on your shoulder?
(Me, Carrie, Ellen, && everyone else that payed attention- CRACKS UP! LMAO)


Good lord, i love her so much hahaha

Update Later!
I LOVE YOU ALL!

2 ♥ love

lets go home && get stoned, we could end up makin love instead of misery. . . [Wednesday
May. 3rd @ 11:10pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

the new, love of my life. . .

isn't he gorgeous?!? hahaha ♥Collapse )

Update Later. . .
I LOVE YOU ALL!

2 ♥ love

the night we met I knew I needed you so, && if I had the chance I'd never let you go. . . [Friday
Apr. 28th @ 8:55pm]
[ mood | scared ]

Well guys, today was pretty much awful.



I got checked out today around 10 && came home because i think i had another anxiety attack.
I swear, i dont know whats wrong with me. I get to feelin bad, && then i get these ideas in my head, and think im more bad off than what i really am. So, of course i started panicin, gettin real hott, shakin pretty bad, && felt real dizzy. When i got home i went to sleep at about 1:30, woke up at 4:30, && havent really felt good all day =/
I think im finally gettin the side effects of Accutane- && it sucks.

When stuff like this happens, i just need someone to tell me im okay && that nothing bad is gonna happen to me.
&& im pretty sure i know who i want to tell me that. . .
i just never get my way anymore though =(

Im not bein selfish, but please guys- pray for me.
♥♥♥

Update Later
I Love You All *

6 ♥ love

Can we go back to the days when our love was strong, can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong.. [Wednesday
Apr. 26th @ 8:11pm]
[ mood | content ]

Hey Guys *

im thinkin about makin a friends cut, because some people dont leave me comments, && i really dont see the point in keepin' em.
Im deletin whoever doesnt comment on this entry.
I leave people comments, && they either dont leave em back- or here recently, they just delete em.

Anyyyywho. . .
If you dont comment on this entry by the end of this week- you're gone.

So get to commentin' bitches ♥

Update Later
I love you all
xox

29 ♥ love

Can we go back to the days when our love was strong, can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong.. [Wednesday
Apr. 26th @ 8:11pm]
Hey Guys *

im thinkin about makin a friends cut, because some people dont leave me comments, && i really dont see the point in keepin' em.
Im deletin whoever doesnt comment on this entry.
I leave people comments, && they either dont leave em back- or here recently, they just delete em.

Anyyyywho. . .
If you dont comment on this entry by the end of this week- you're gone.

So get to commentin' bitches ♥

Update Later
I love you all
xox</big>
love

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